Uncle G’s Corner
A part of…Uncle G’s FUN 420 Reviews
Age Recommendation: Adults Only!
Issue: XI (or something like that)
Publish Date: 11 April 2020
Buying Cannabis Legally While Safely Six Feet Away
Words and Photos by Gary “Uncle G” Brown
I can’t imagine surviving a pandemic without the help of cannabis, and modern living. I’m inside my cave. The rent is paid. I’m forever grateful, believe me. A blu the dreaded e-collar writer such as myself, I’m fucked in some ways and blessed in others. Keep in mind. this was life before the dreaded, COVID-19. Damn! What a scary world we all live in nowadays. Hopefully, one reads this article after the virus is stopped in its tracks. A cure. Humanity a hundred years ago would be in far worse shape. I’m staying indoors. Except for supplies. Only going out, as seldom as possible. Keeping a safe distance and intermingling with as few humans as needed. Sounds horrible. I’m trying hard to follow all medical advice given, as to how to stay healthy. I’d really hate for my demise to be part of a sad statistic; dead boomers.
Life has changed for everyone, including myself. Mentally, physically, and sexually as well. I read on the Internet website Reddit, that more people because of having to stay inside, are masturbating more. Researching more on the topic, it is said to be common with, cabin fever. Lucky us, it’s the twenty-first century. For those horny ones who could afford it, FaceTime can be CumTime. It’s kinky, I imagine. Nothing I’d personally indulge in. Reminds me of the phone sex rage, back in the 1980s. All those lovely 976 phone numbers. Advertised on TV late at night. Scantly clad beautiful looking young ladies, usually. What could be described as porn music could be heard in the background. A ravishing brunette looks seductively at the camera and says:
“Call me and for a small fee of $4.00 a minute, I’ll help you rub one out.”
No…just kidding. Back in the day Tv had people that would have censored that. Maybe allowed on the cable channels? Honestly, every commercial I ever witnessed, that’s what my penis always heard. Very enticing. Especially when the wife was asleep. The realization; She’s currently shoring and farting. No pussy until tomorrow. The main brain (between thy legs) then rationalizes that for ONLY $20, you could get off, twice. Those were the days. Race home and get the mail first, on the day the phone bill arrived. Who would know? Decades later, we can watch each other in real-time, and see for ourselves each other’s, orgasm face. For free (with friends or strangers that meet online) or for a fee. I’m older. Adding video to this experience, to me is kind of creepy. Yet alone in high definition.
Besides myself, people adapt. I hope that life will be back to normal, very soon. I so much prefer being in a bar, drinking beer, getting picked up, and seeing what happens when naked and in a motel room together. Not on a computer.
One day our Governor (Nevada) came on the television and said that certain businesses were not, essential. I have not been to Planet Fitness since. I’m major bummed out. It was part of my morning routine to go there and flirt with the older ladies. Check out the butts. Most people its said, go to the gym so they look better when naked in front of others. Of course, that’s a benefit. I tend to go so when in need, the weaker muscles could be helped by the stronger ones. I started going to the gym in 2015, after having two surgeries the following year. I’m wounded, so I keep whatever I do when it comes to exercising, as simple as possible. I certainly don’t want to hurt myself, any worse than I already am.
For my age, just staying fuckable is a major achievement. A lot of boomers let themselves go, physically by the time they hit their mid-forties. My stomach looked like it swallowed a basketball, before the surgeries I previously mentioned. I did have a hernia, but all blame could not be put on that. I confess to having a sweet tooth. Because of that mostly, I established horrible eating habits over the decades. Such as chowing down only when hungry. Sounds logical. The problem was that I would have meals after smoking pot, at 11 pm. Sometimes, frozen Tv dinners. Then after getting full, I would go immediately to sleep. Then wake up at 5:30 am to go to work.
At my heaviest, I was 240 pounds. At six foot I could stand straight up, look directly down, and due to my protruding belly, could hardly see my…toes. Because of almost daily walks in the hood, and going to whatever the nearest gym was, I’m down to my 180s. Until…
Am I the only one? Staying in the house almost all the time, and all this talk of death on cable news because of the Corona Virus (COVID-19 ), I’m stressed and eating like a…dare I say it…a fucking farm animal. I’m buying the groceries that others have passed over. Yet I still feel blessed. And especially when it comes to coming legally buying, legal cannabis.
I’m not complaining. Purchasing legal cannabis in the fabulous city of Las Vegas has become more difficult. And costly. At least for myself. I don’t know other consumer experiences when it comes to how much they are spending now, compared to how much it cost before all this Coronavirus, bullshit. Just my own. I’m now paying double, what I did at the start of the year. More than one reason why.
Supply and Demand
Its nowhere near as easy to purchase bud, anywhere in Sin City, legally. I drive by a lot of closed dispensaries, when out and about running errands or getting supplies. As little as possible. Being a man my age, an ex cigarette smoker, the invisible monster worries me. Can’t give in. Informed and unafraid. Onward through the fog.
For whatever reasons, the otherwise seemingly smooth place of business lacks knowledge on how to carry on. Selling cannabis is essential in my mind, but what about everyone else? I would say more important than liquor stores. Booze is highly addictive. Something we don’t hear said enough. To cut off that flow, would be disastrous to society on the whole.
Essential Legal Weed
The challenges dispensaries face are difficult, but not impossible to overcome. One place I used to go to all the time, less than a mile from where I stay, is now doing deliveries only. A $50 minimum so not to get charged for the actual delivery; $10.00 + tip for the driver. What used to be my $25 walkout price for an eighth, has now doubled in price. And this is the cheaper weed, I am referring too.
You order one day and get the home delivery, the next. Its cash at the door. The delivery person I dealt with, seemed good at her job. A pleasant personality – attractive looking female that I would think to be in her twenties. The young lady had on a regular pair of jeans, and I noticed her having a rather nice tush, as she was walking away. Good for her. Meanwhile, the sight of her behind, also made me wish I was 30 years younger.
The delivery a success. A little later it was noticed that one of the cannabis strains was harvested almost a year old. The child-proof packages that the weed was contained in, had traces of dust on it. The cannabis received was mostly CBD (cannabidiol) with a low THC count. Probably not that popular. It is akin to drinking, near-beer. Usually, people want cannabis with a high THC count. Not the lowest. Hard to get a buzz off of what was ordered. That wasn’t the point. This particular strain was obtained more for its healing effects; arthritis. The small percentage of THC compliments, nicely. In e-mail, the age of the herb sold was brought up to the dispensary where the purchase took place. A few days has now gone by, and no response as of yet.
For the last month, I’ve been buying my cannabis exclusively at a dispensary within five miles from where I stay called; NUWU Cannabis Marketplace.
The location I go to is located in North Vegas and the business on tribal land. NUWU advertises that they have the only drive-thru cannabis business, in all of Las Vegas. The lines I experienced are typically a quarter-mile long or longer. Double lanes, and triple lanes. I tend to turn off the vehicle while waiting, instead of letting it idle. Appears well organized. Plenty of knowledgeable salespeople walking around; budtenders. I order online. When it’s my turn I give someone my name and show them my ID. We then go over what I ordered. I give them enough money to cover all costs; product + tax. I wait. The lines go around the cannabis marketplace. Turning a corner means the end is near. Someone comes out with a plastic bin of childproof envelopes, you say your name, you receive your product and change if that was the case, and away you go, a happy consumer. Happened to me so far in a month, three times. Never a problem.
The other people waiting with me, even when I was way in the back of the line, seemed as patient as I was, knowing the payoff wasn’t that far away. Average waiting time, speaking of just my experiences; 45 minutes to an hour. Not the norm, I would guess. That would have been before the CornoaVirus pandemic. The employees all wear gloves, a mask, and are conducting business from six feet away. So that chews up some extra time, whereas not having to deal with ALL that, transactions would certainly be must speedier. No complaints from yours truly. Everyone knows why those safety measures were in place. I appreciate the action taken by NUWU Cannabis Marketplace.
In the drive-thru line were mostly regular vehicles. Some older cars and trucks. People of all ages. Several folks with the handicap placard in plain sight. Perhaps having a license for medical marijuana? The one year I’ve been buying pot in Vegas, it’s always been recreational. I inquired about medical since I had a license in Colorado, but never pursued it. I’m buying the legal stuff, so I’m not breaking any laws. The savings if I did get a medical marijuana card here in Nevada, would be minimal based on the quantity I purchase monthly. In Colorado, the financial savings were well worth the effort. At least while I lived there (2016 – 2019).
I also saw people on those red carts and bicycles. The police were present. It was all cool. And get this, NUWU is open; 24/7. They never close! And when we go back to the way things were…holy shit! I will make it a point, to go over every inch of this place. The store is, HUGE! Devoted to marijuana. NUWU Cannabis Marketplace even has a tasting room.
You know, I just might when ALL this CoronaVirus bullshit is over, make NUWU my regular dispensary. It would mean driving pass three to five other dispensaries. Round trip would be about, ten miles. That would include a little highway driving. Worth it, and here’s why. When the cannabis community needed them, NUWU was there. Simple as that. I’m a loyal boomer, and NUWU Cannabis Marketplace sure has gotten my attention. Oh, and here is what matters the most; excellent quality weed. I’ve been driving away with a NUWU signature strain (indica), and a hybrid (indica dominate) from the good people at Fleur; Cookies n Cream. Satisfying smoke!
I took my first hit of reefer when Richard M. Nixon was President. He’s on record, audiotape probably, saying how he despised marijuana. The hippies in response to this, would go around saying aloud to whoever could hear, as if the man was standing in front of them: “You suck, Dick!!!” The ladies always seemed appalled, who happened to be walking by. A few of the guys were like: Not so loud.
In all earnest, I recommend NUWU Cannabis Marketplace to anyone of legal age and has an interest in cannabis; recreational or medical (or both). Just try not to be there, when I am. And oh yeah…please use responsibly.
A bit of a warning. I’m sure the surroundings will certainly improve as time goes by, but the area whereas NUWU Cannabis Marketplace, is located at is kind of on the dicey side. Not a part of the city that you would want to have any car problems in. The cannabis dispensary has cameras, cops, and plenty of security…no worries shopping there. Bring Grandma, and her dear friend Kathi, but keep the kids at home.
NUWU Cannabis Marketplace, 1235 Paiute Circle Las Vegas, NV 89106 is open 24 hours, Monday — Sunday.
NUWU Cannabis Marketplace Official Twitter Page – https://twitter.com/nuwucannabis