Uncle G’s FUN 420 Reviews
Spotlight: DGF Strawberry Cough X Slimer (sativa)
Grower: Desert Grown Farms
THC: 20.69 percent
Harvested: 14 Feb 2019
Las Vegas Cannabis Dispensary: Essence Cannabis Dispensary
Story and photography by Gary “Uncle G” Brown
If you don’t like movies, then just gloss over the beginning of this.
Who has seen the adult R rated comedy masterpiece, Caddyshack? Released in 1980. I saw the film in a movie theater in Hollywood, Florida, with my now first ex-wife. Along with the whole audience, we laughed till it hurt, and then we laughed more. Mostly all of us strangers to each other, who at the same place and at the same time, were collectively having a seemingly wonderful time. We paid the box office, and they (the wonderful cast and writers), truly delivered. Caddyshack would make my list for ‘top 25 favorite movies’, should one day I decide to create one.
The opening scene. You hear the singing of oohs and aahs. The sun had just risen. The vampires are all now snug in their …wait…their are no vampires in Caddyshack. Maybe if they were in Caddyshack II, the film would have been more enjoyable?
The sound of sprinklers. A hypnotic rhythm. For visuals, add; The Gopher. So we learn throughout the movie, good-natured unless provoked. And then there’s the one, the only…Mr. Carl Spackler. He comes later (and so we are to assume, it’s by his own hand). Before that visual, musically a fantastic bridge/intro to the Kenny Loggins tune; I’m Alright. The lead song that paves the way to one of the most fun R rated adult movies, ever made. to me, the opening scene could also be a visual that’s akin to a type of cannabis called; sativa. Hear me out. Capable of motivating a person after a couple of tokes, to stand up (provided they were sitting) and shout out to the world; I am on my way, to a great day. Seeing the sunrise over the golf course. Hearing the automatic sprinkler turn on and start doing its rhythmic job of watering the grass. Good morning! Anything is possible, both in this movie and in real life.
Easy to remember. If looking to medicate and desiring to feel like you have energy, a budtender would point you towards a straight sativa, or a cannabis hybrid that had a greater percentage of sativa in it, then indica.
A friend of mine in Colorado told me how he schooled his girlfriend on the basis of marijuana. When it came to indica; In The Couch. I’ve mentioned the expression before, here on the Gary “Uncle G” Brown Archives. It works for me! Pleasantly medicated while at the same time chillin’ watching Tv and eating your favorite comfort food. Indica chills you out, and with that can come a lot of healing effects.
Sativa is for me, the perfect; wake & bake. Everyone is different but I can honestly say I’ve felt ‘happy’ on more than one occasion starting the day off with a nice mostly sativa, or straight up sativa strain. It seemed to give me a special energy. The more THC, the more heightened one can feel under its influence. For the beginners reading this, please be careful to get into the ‘higher’ THC numbers. Is capable of giving you the idea; “Let’s paint the house, today!” Another pro is the cannabis in general, can contain, healing effects. It comes in handy after a BIG chore such as painting the whole house. The first home I purchased belonged to a nice man who only painted, the front of his home. Two stories, plus an attic. It was a duplex so the city made me pay taxes on, two homes. Bless their souls. The two sides and the back had not seen a drop of fresh paint, in decades probably. The front of the house that received a yearly do-over, looked very nice. again, like he was. Maybe crusty on the sides and back? Only his family members would know for sure.
Reading thus far one could perhaps assume that I knew my shit when talking about cannabis. In a way I do. That’s chalked up to experience. The first time someone passed me a joint, I was 12 years old. Of course, I didn’t say, no. Learning the hard way, sometimes. Never purchased oregano thinking it was marijuana. I knew dumb fucks who did that. Embarrassing when I would inform them. Happened more than once. Not to the same person. How stupid would you have to be to fall for that twice? In a time they call, the 1970s. The good old days. What? Not for marijuana.
I’ll repeat this for those who are new, getting into my steady supply of articles that you’ll see from me on here (Gary “Uncle G” Brown Archives). Today, I am currently residing in a state (NV) that’s totally cool about cannabis. More expensive than other states. Matter of factly, one almost got to be a high roller to afford what the dispensaries here in Vegas, has to offer. Primo shit! That being the case (Uncle G warned you) I recommend to suck up, get over the sticker shock, pay (cash), and then play in a safe matter. Obey the laws. Use to medicate. Las Vegas while stoned, is fucking wild! Especially at night. Very visual. So much different shit going on. Traveling here from out of state with your own supply is not a wise idea. And I’m talking to both rec and med users. I’ve been rooting for total legalization and decriminalization, for decades now. We’re still not there. Get busted in a state that’s still unfriendly regarding cannabis, and you’ll regret bringing it with you. To these 20th century throwbacks, medical marijuana means taking all the money they could get away in the disguise of; fines and fees. Repeat after me; ignorant bastards. In 2019 their actions resemble that of pirates, and not the ‘Disney’ kind.
First timer? No need to learn the hard way thanks to the budtenders who wait on you, typically in any cannabis dispensary you may visit. Knowledgeable salespeople. Here at ‘Essence Cannabis Dispensary’, all was perfect. Heads up, some budtenders can be snooty. Again, not my experience at ‘Essence Cannabis Dispensary’. Myself, I like the budtender types who are more knowledgeable down to earth types. Someone I might sit in a circle with and share some smoke with. It makes me more comfortable as a consumer. The fancy ones, nerdy botanist types, make me nervous. Can talk over your head, or even down to you. Smartest in the room, one can only assume. If a bad experience with a budtender, speak out LOUDLY; I’m wearing clean underwear – and the manager will promptly get right to you. Anymore yelling about having great hygiene, and be prepared to be shown the door.
Heads up. I’m not an expert on cannabis, nor pretend to play one on Tv. So far I haven’t been offered the role. I am just saying that I don’t know it all when it comes to today’s cannabis. Life in general. I try to learn and if possible change opinions, every day. Various topics. Stop growing as a functional human being, and the Grim Reaper starts to take notice.
I like my ganja like I enjoy my whiskey; strong. Normal for me to ask a budtender for the highest THC count. Does that mean one can rule out all the strains with lower THC counts? For medical use? For those well educated, I’d come across like a total idiot saying yes to that. Fully understood. And I wanted to get that across because if reading all I wrote here on my own archival website, I can see where one can get the wrong impression. Different ailments. Different cures.
Here in May of 2019, I’m happy, will call a day a success, if able to go through it with minimal pain or discomfort. Smoking grass (old-time slang) and just trying to live as healthy as possible. Good food and drink choices. No taking a selfie while hanging over a cliff of a mountain looking hundreds of feet down. Results don’t come unless one takes action. I go to the gym, on a semi-regular basis. I have injuries and whatnot so there is only so much I can do. I go for walks. Mostly because I don’t have a car (at the present time). And I’m finding out first hand that I am still capable of learning new things. I am grateful, especially seeing how I am closer to age 60 than I am 55.
Uncle G’s FUN Medical Marijuana Strain Review
DGF Strawberry Cough X Slimer (sativa)
Grower: Desert Grown Farms
THC: 20.69 percent
Harvested: 14 Feb 2019
Obtained at: Essence Cannabis Dispensary (Las Vegas)
I had a good experience with it. Used it exclusively for several days. Made a quarter ounce last longer than usual. This included something totally shocking. One day…actually over 24 hours, I rested. No cannabis. No horror stories to tell. Didn’t feel compelled to jump off a high rise building. What happened? The high on my next wake & bake was a tad more intense. Explains in part how I made that quarter last, as long as it did.
Using DGF Strawberry Cough X Slimer (sativa)…again exclusively (meaning no smoking of other strains), I was able to truly medicate; Wake & Bake (couple solid hits) – Noon (couple solid hits) – Early Evening (couple hits) – and that was it. Not too late at night because it was a sativa. I wanted a good night’s sleep. The reward was I cleansed my system going 12 hours without. Should write a book: How To Make a Quarter Ounce Last 8 Days. All went well. No drama to tell. A little new for me from always doing, indica. Proved to myself a sativa could work as well in helping to deal with the everyday aches and pains.
I was tempted to use another delivery system; bong. Instead of my trusted pipe. Imagine that. Maybe the next time? It would be more, intense. A new story to tell. A new cannabis strain, available right here in fabulous Las Vegas. In all reality, one that you yourself could buy, and experience yourself. Beware, too much time goes by and the strain might not be around. and while using…opportunity knocks…please obey our cannabis laws. As they use to say; what happens in Las Vegas, stays in Las Vegas. Including your legal marijuana. Like that used condom, leave it here. PLEASE do not even think about carrying whatever weed you purchase, while in Nevada, across state lines. Horrible idea. I don’t care how thrifty you are. Like the whore you’d never introduce to, dear old Mom and Dad, discard and walk away. Bringing IT home is totally unwise! I don’t care how frugal you are. It’s an “Uncle G” No No.
Got too much cannabis left over? Here I come (Uncle G) to save the day. Get in touch with me via electronic mail. Why you ask? So you can give me whatever you have that is legal marijuana (purchased in a dispensary) or anything else cannabis-related. Meaning the actual bud, or any paraphernalia valued over a hundred bucks, or more. No need for thanks. Consider it a public service that I really don’t mind volunteering for. Always glad to help out my fellow man, or woman.
In all sincerity, stay buzzed…I’m already working on another write-up. And many more in the pipeline. Vital or throw away information on anything cannabis or cannabis-related, from yours truly.
Desert Grown Farms –
Essence Cannabis Dispensary –
Caddyshack (on Blu-ray) – https://www.amazon.com/Caddyshack-Blu-ray-Chevy-Chase/dp/B000Q7ZOAI